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    Wednesday
    Jul132011

    the 12 month plan - defined

    Spiritual & Emotional

    GOAL:  To figure out whom I want to be when "mom" is not the first word used to describe me. To be emotionally and spiritually healthy to move somewhere on my own. To be ready for a relationship when Mr. Wonderful comes along.

    TASKS:  I wish it were that easy – to just make a task list.  Unfortunately, this one is the hardest, and I haven't a clue how to get started.

    Financial

    GOAL:  To be ready for a mortgage for my fabulous new place to live and to be able to afford the moving costs.

    TASKS:  Pay off all credit cards and put more money in the bank.  Means an end to a lot of discretionary spending.  Difficult – but since I'm the arbiter of what's considered discretionary….

    PLANNING TOOL:  Spreadsheet, and continued use of Quicken to manage my finances

    Residential

    GOAL:  To get this beautiful 100+ yr old house ready to sell. 

    TASKS:  Going room by room, making minor repairs, washing windows, trim & walls, and most importantly getting rid of the junk (or treasures, depending on how you look at it) we don't need. Let me know if there's stuff you want - get it quick before it goes to Goodwill.

    PLANNING TOOL:  Large 14 month calendar showing the schedule of rooms and tasks to be completed

    Physical

    GOAL:  To be all around healthier.  It will include weight loss, but I'll concentrate on healthy eating and getting in better shape. Valuable for many reasons, the most important one being that I'm the only parent my kids have and I intend to live to 100.  Secondly, we're planning a European 50th birthday trip next summer, and I need to have the energy and stamina to walk a lot and not be ready to go to bed at 9 pm.

    TASKS:  You know the drill – weight training, cardio, more fruits and vegetables.  How much will I share with you?  I don't know.  Don't ask a woman her weight, but since I'll be baring my soul about everything else I suppose I will need to offer disclosure in this area also. 

    PLANNING TOOL:  Weight loss count down poster

     

    No people, I'm not really compulsive about everything.  My house and my desk are normally in relative state of mess, but I'm really good at making a plan and executing it. 

    Tuesday
    Jul122011

    12 month plan

    I live in the small town that I moved to two days after my college graduation.  I thought I would stay for 2 years or so and then move to a larger city to pursue my design career. 

    And then I fell in love.  And got married.  And had 3 children.  27 years later and I’m still here.

    When I went thru my divorce I promised my ex I would stay here until the kids got out of high school so that he could be a part of their lives every day.  He was a big part of their lives.  So we stayed.

    Two years ago when he died unexpectedly the kids needed the stability of their friends and so did I.   So we stayed.

    Next May when my youngest daughter graduates from high school I won’t have to stay.  They will all be in college, and I’m 99% sure that they won’t be coming back here.  I will be free to decide where I want to live and what I want to do, for the first time in my adult life. And I don’t know that I’ll have the courage to make the big changes.

    I manage design and construction projects, and everything I do has a project plan, a spreadsheet, milestones and deliverables.  My 12 month plan does too.  It outlines the work necessary for me to be prepared to make big changes when these 12 months are up.  I’ll go into greater detail later, but suffice it to say the plan is thorough.  (And of course it comes with beautiful spreadsheets & schedules – I do believe in pretty)

    My kids? They are remarkable.  They’ve encouraged me to GO and DO whatever I choose.  And BE whomever I choose to be while they are moving on to college & careers.  It's great to have their support. 

    Being a parent is the most important thing I will ever do, but it's not supposed to be the only thing. Soon the day to day work of parenting will be over.  And I need to be ready.

    Friday
    Jul082011

    hello

    I have a plan.  A 12 month plan.  It started in June 2011, and ends August 5th, 2012. (I know it's actually 14 months, but 12 sounds better)

    The day I turn 50. 

    The summer when all 3 of my children will be in college.  

    The time I've been waiting for - and afraid of - for years.

    So this is my journey to an empty nest - and solitude,  please join me?




     

     

     

     

     

     

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